There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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