On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
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