I bet he comes in French.
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
25 People Share How They Got Out Of Their Longest Dry Spell
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
21 People Confess Their Craziest Online Dating Experience
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.