about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
Randomize
