if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
