His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
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