i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
