Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
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