I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
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