it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
