He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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