I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Randomize
