Texts From Last Night

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  (416): View more from Ontario

  The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.

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  (416): The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look. http://tfl.nu/2p75
  Replies (13) Good night (856) Bad night (3473)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?

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  (917): you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom? http://tfl.nu/36az
  Replies (238) Good night (5094) Bad night (1353)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.

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  (503): I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there. http://tfl.nu/oh3e
  Replies (19) Good night (4490) Bad night (746)
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy

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  (608): the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy <3's balls" is written in sharpie across my forehead http://tfl.nu/cffy
  Replies (24) Good night (1716) Bad night (4729)
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  (212): View more from New York

  so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before

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  (212): so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before http://tfl.nu/29hu
  Replies (16) Good night (2148) Bad night (4543)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.

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  (314): Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one. http://tfl.nu/fj7c
  Replies (7) Good night (8917) Bad night (1157)
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  (337): View more from Louisiana

  Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.

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  (337): Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm. http://tfl.nu/whuj
  Replies (39) Good night (7594) Bad night (1274)
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  (432): View more from Texas

  Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"

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  (432): Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat" http://tfl.nu/ofhr
  Replies (20) Good night (9620) Bad night (1286)
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...

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  (484): he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car... http://tfl.nu/7kdq
  Replies (5) Good night (2574) Bad night (1405)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...

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  (416): You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere... http://tfl.nu/u20i
  Replies (6) Good night (2295) Bad night (1851)
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  (406): View more from Montana

  you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob

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  (406): you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob http://tfl.nu/ha8t
  Replies (9) Good night (2989) Bad night (999)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?

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  (615): Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ? http://tfl.nu/0u6g
  Replies (5) Good night (2331) Bad night (1035)
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  (337): View more from Louisiana

  Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?

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  (337): Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think? http://tfl.nu/0xiw
  Replies (9) Good night (988) Bad night (1364)
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  (218): View more from Minnesota

  No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.

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  (218): No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating. http://tfl.nu/5a1l
  Replies (10) Good night (2601) Bad night (732)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations

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  (210): We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations http://tfl.nu/4p6w
  Replies (3) Good night (664) Bad night (163)

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