Texts From Last Night

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  (515): View more from Iowa

  I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards

  (1-515): View more from Iowa

  None

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  (515): I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards (1-515): None http://tfl.nu/5j7f
  Replies (17) Good night (3328) Bad night (757)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...

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  (202): did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this... http://tfl.nu/5zp7
  Replies (29) Good night (1290) Bad night (5172)
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters

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  (405): I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters http://tfl.nu/onkh
  Replies (20) Good night (994) Bad night (3955)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...

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  (317): All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"... http://tfl.nu/vy09
  Replies (6) Good night (4803) Bad night (914)
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.

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  (757): He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds. http://tfl.nu/ihy8
  Replies (41) Good night (2924) Bad night (4728)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.

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  (330): Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge. http://tfl.nu/j5wy
  Replies (8) Good night (4368) Bad night (906)
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.

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  (602): UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle. http://tfl.nu/69ov
  Replies (7) Good night (1722) Bad night (859)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?

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  (443): At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together? http://tfl.nu/40u8
  Replies (6) Good night (518) Bad night (1897)
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  (309): View more from Illinois

  he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel

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  (309): he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel http://tfl.nu/08pr
  Replies (8) Good night (1234) Bad night (423)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...

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  (313): Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door... http://tfl.nu/qt3a
  Replies (19) Good night (683) Bad night (1942)
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  (971): View more from Oregon

  I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.

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  (971): I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up. http://tfl.nu/s3lx
  Replies (4) Good night (1369) Bad night (424)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.

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  (401): He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached. http://tfl.nu/uw2g
  Replies (1) Good night (720) Bad night (300)
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  (310): View more from California

  What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.

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  (310): What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business. http://tfl.nu/a4r2
  Replies (5) Good night (2163) Bad night (449)
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  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding

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  (267): only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding http://tfl.nu/47vz
  Replies (3) Good night (819) Bad night (305)
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  (989): View more from Michigan

  I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.

  (347): View more from New York

  Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.

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  (989): I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee. (347): Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly. http://tfl.nu/n2ti
  Replies (2) Good night (814) Bad night (232)

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