I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize