Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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