why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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