we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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