U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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