Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Randomize
