We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Randomize
