dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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