I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
