butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
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