i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Randomize
