Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Randomize