There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
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