none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
