I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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