I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Randomize
