"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Randomize