i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
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