I think I am morally bankrupt
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
