Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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