He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
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