Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
These 19 People Had Awkward Celebrity Sex Dreams
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
These 27 People Had No Idea What They Were Doing When It Came To Sex
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks