Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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