cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I came so hard my ears popped.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
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