What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Randomize
