you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
