Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Randomize
