Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
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