you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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