you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
