Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
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I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
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The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
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