Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Randomize
