escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
