Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize
