just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Randomize
