I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
