We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
