How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Randomize
