I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
