i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize