I CAN MOONWALK!
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize
